Prendre soin de soi... On sait tous que c'est important et pourtant...

C'est souvent ce qu'on repousse à plus tard...

Souvent je me demande quand nous allons arrêter de nous sentir coupables parce que nous avons choisi de faire une sieste, d'aller se promener, ou encore de ne rien faire pendant une heure... quand probablement nous aurions besoin d'une demi-journée voire d'une journée complète pour s'occuper vraiment de nous.  

Peut-être qu'en lisant ces lignes tu te dis que ce n'est pas la quantité qui compte, mais la qualité. Et de manière générale je suis d'accord, mais si en 2019 dix minutes de méditation me permettaient de me recentrer, aujourd'hui je dois bien constater que ce n'est plus le cas.
Mes besoins ont changé. Qu'en est-il pour toi?

Au début de la pandémie, avec le choc de cet événement, j'ai vraiment eu besoin de m'arrêter.  Je me souviens que je passais 5 heures par jour à prendre soin de moi. C'était assez génial.
Puis, j'ai commencé à me dire: "je ne peux pas faire ça encore pendant un mois, je dois travailler,  me mettre au service de... et tellement d'autres choses"

Et pourtant... la pandémie est toujours bien présente. Les restrictions sur ce qu'on a le droit de faire ou non ont un impact majeur sur nos vies. Et pourtant je me suis laissée auto-convaincre que c'était ok de ne pas prendre autant soin de moi. Mais ce n'est pas ok. C'est même dangereux.

A l'heure où le nombre de dépressions, suicides et autres problèmes de santé mentale ne font qu'augmenter dans le monde, il est plus que jamais notre devoir de prendre soin de nous, car si nous ne le faisons pas nous ne serons vraiment plus capables de faire quoi que ce soit.

Remettons-nous au centre de notre vie, en priorité. C'est uniquement en faisant cela d'abord que nous pourrons aider les autres et servir la planète.

Nous surfons de véritables tsunamis émotionnels et énergétiques depuis presque bientôt un an. Alors soyons encore plus bienveillants et doux avec nous-mêmes, et avec les autres!

Personnellement je sens que je suis plus souvent à fleur de peau. Je dormais tellement bien depuis 10 ans... et là cela fait plusieurs mois que je souffre d'insomnies. Je me sens bien plus souvent stressée, en colère et triste...Et je le sens aussi chez les gens autour de moi (ou sur les réseaux sociaux!)

Donc pour contrebalancer ceci, il est important que j'augmente également mon niveau de joie, d'amour, et de légèreté! Et cela prend du temps... Et je sais, par expérience que si je prends ce temps, je serai bien plus efficace après!

Malheureusement, souvent on se dit que ce n'est pas possible. Mon invitation aujourd'hui est de vous demander si c'est vrai.

De plus la quantité et la manière de prendre soin de soi varient considérablement d'une personne à l'autre; alors arrêtons de nous comparer.

Certaines personnes ont besoin de 9h de sommeil pour se sentir reposées, d'autres de 6. Une personne peut se sentir vraiment bien après 1h de Qi-gong, une autre aura besoin de faire une grande balade en nature après. Pour certains, courir sera un exutoire, pour d'autres c'est danser ou chanter, etc.

Nous sommes tous différents et c'est totalement ok! Trouve ce qui marche pour toi.

Et si tu entends une petite voix qui dit : "je n'ai pas assez de temps", "je dois travailler", "ça va aller, ça va passer tout seul", etc.
Essaie d'écouter plutôt  l'autre voix, la voix de ton âme, celle qui est bienveillante et qui va te guider à créer, être et choisir ce qui est juste et bon pour toi!

Si tu sens le besoin de soutien pour apprendre à augmenter ton niveau d'amour pour toi-même et ton niveau de joie, prends rendez-vous avec moi pour un appel découverte gratuit pour faire le point.
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When are we ever going to stop feeling guilty about taking an hour to rest, sleep, do nothing or go for a walk... when really we probably need half-a-day or even a whole day.

I remember at the beginning of the pandemic I would spend 5 hours a day taking care of myself. It was great. But then I thought: "I can't do this forever. I have to work and do other things."

And yet the pandemic is still very much present. The restrictions on what we are allowed to do or not have a huge impact on our lives. And somehow I let myself convince that it was ok to do less self-care. But it is not. It is a slippery slope...the amount of mental health issues in the world is increasing every day...

When we don't take care of ourselves enough we end up broke and we can't do anything anymore. So what is the point?
We have been surfing tsunamis of emotions and energies in a very complicated worldwide situation for almost a year now. So let's be even more gentle and kind with ourselves and with others.

Personally I can feel I am more often edgy than usual. I haven't been sleeping as well as I used to before 2020. I can feel and see that stress, sorrow and anger are more present than ever in me and around me. So the amount of love and joy that I need to experience to counterbalance all of that is huge!

For instance I wasn't able to go on a retreat as I usually do once or twice a year to recharge my batteries. So yes I've decided I will give myself a break and allow my body and soul to rest, digest, process in order to create more love and more joy. And I wish you the same.

Unfortunately, we often tell ourselves that we can't. My invitation if to ask yourself if that's really true.
Also, the amount of self-care or the form it takes is very personal. Let's not compare. Somebody might need 9 hours of sleep to feel rested while somebody else might need 6. One person might feel great after an hour of Qi-gong, another will need to go for a long walk afterwards to feel recharged. Maybe for you it's running that helps, while for somebody dancing is the way to go. We are all different. So find out what works for you.

And if you hear this voice saying "there is not enough time", "I can't", "I'm fine, it will pass on its own", "I should really work", etc. Try to listen to your other voice, the loving voice of your soul...
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Do you need support to learn how to increase your levels of self-care, self-love and joy? Check out my work and book a free discovery call here.

Subscribe to my newsletter here, and get a free healing meditation. 

La situation mondiale actuelle nous pousse dans nos retranchements. Nous avons toutes et tous dû nous adapter rapidement à des changements et des mesures parfois incompréhensibles. Selon notre niveau socio-économique et notre lieu de vie, nous avons traversé des choses bien différentes, mais nous avons toutes et tous traversé quelque chose, et nous le traversons encore. Prenons le temps de reconnaître ce qui a changé en nous, autour de nous. Il est important d’accueillir et de digérer les diverses vagues d’émotions.
Aujourd’hui encore je vois passer beaucoup de commentaires et j’entends des remarques agressives et intolérantes dans tous les coins ; je joue aussi ma part dans cette dynamique, même si j’essaie de le faire le moins possible. Nous sommes sans arrêt dans le jugement (moi y compris) et parfois aussi dans les conclusions hâtives. Derrière les gens qui portent des masques, il y aurait de la peur, des moutons, etc. Derrière ceux qui refusent de le porter des égoïstes et des irresponsables, etc. Personnellement je refuse de croire cela et de jouer ce jeu de la division. La situation est ultra complexe, multi-niveaux, multi-critères.
Je n’ai pas envie de rentrer dans cette énergie de l’intolérance et de la séparation. J’ai mon avis sur la question bien entendu, et cela me regarde. Dans tous les cas, derrière ce choix, il y a des valeurs, des filtres, des croyances, des émotions et probablement des blessures. Il est parfois difficile de voir cela chez soi comme chez l’autre, mais cela me paraît tellement important. Alors faisons un pas au fond de soi d’abord, puis vers l’autre pour essayer de le comprendre. Pour moi dans tout ce qu’on lit on peut trouver une part de vérité, et on peut tout prouver, ainsi que son contraire. L’incohérence, les contradictions, les différences d’opinion, les incompréhensions peuvent nous bouleverser, nous déstabiliser et nous épuiser. Cependant il n’y a pas UNE vérité mais bien DES vérités. Il y a aussi des mémoires inconscientes individuelles et collectives qui remontent à grand flot. Pour moi ce n’est pas négatif, au contraire, même si c’est difficile, tout ce qui remonte peut être guéri ! C’est une occasion en or si on est prêt-e à aller regarder et travailler cela consciemment.
Pour commencer, il est plus que jamais primordial de rester centré : prenons une respiration et reconnectons-nous à notre essence, pour sentir ce qui est juste pour nous. Dès que nous en sentons le besoin, retirons-nous de ce brouhaha général et revenons à notre corps et notre essence. Qu’est-ce que cette situation réveille en moi ? De quoi j’ai besoin ? Comment puis-je me reconnecter à moi ? Comment puis-je me remplir, me recharger d’amour et de bienveillance, penser et agir par moi-même sans me mettre en colère contre l’autre parce qu’il ne partage pas mon avis.

Récemment j’ai vécu un moment de stress intense et cela m’a permis de me rappeler à quel point les émotions difficiles sont fatigantes.  Notre flux énergétique se bloque et notre corps en fait les frais. On peut vite s’y habituer, mais le mal-être n’est pas normal et n’est pas quelque chose auquel on devrait s’habituer. Je crois profondément que la légèrèté et la joie sont notre état naturel, auquel nous avons toutes et tous droit ! Une chose que je fais régulièrement c’est me nettoyer pour laisser aller les énergies et les émotions qui ne m’appartiennent pas : faire de la place, laisser aller tout ce dont je n’ai pas besoin, tout ce qui entrave ma connexion à ma puissance intérieure, à mon âme. Ensuite je demande ma recharge énergétique ET je rappelle à moi toutes les parties de moi que j’ai abandonnées, tous les fragments de mon âme qui sont partis ailleurs, les énergies que j’ai laissées dans des situations ou avec des personnes. Tu peux faire ça en visualisation, en mouvement, ancré-e dans la Terre ou juste avec les phrases. Il y a plein de façons de pratiquer, l’important c’est l’intention.
Après m’être nettoyé-e et rechargé-e, je suis alignée et je peux prendre le temps de sentir avec l’entier de mon être ce qui est juste pour moi et comment avancer dans ce monde tourmenté. Je peux aussi écouter l’autre, mieux le comprendre et continuer de lui envoyer de la lumière et de l’amour même si je suis en désaccord. Personnellement je choisis de me concentrer chaque jour sur ce qui est lumineux et beau dans ce monde, car il y a beaucoup plus de belles choses, belles personnes et de lumière qu’on ne le nous le montre. Après, je comprends aussi que pour d’autres personnes c’est important de parler, de crier, de se révolter, de se battre, de défendre haut et fort son opinion. Ce n’est pas mon combat car cela me vide d’énergie, mais je sais que pour d’autres, cela les remplit. C’est à toi de savoir et surtout de sentir ce qui est juste pour toi. Le monde a besoin de tout le monde, des gens au front, comme des gens derrière qui soutiennent l’ascension de la vibration, le nettoyage, etc.
 
Si tu as envie de te reconnecter à toi, de te recharger, de retrouver joie, légèreté, prends rendez-vous avec moi pour un appel découverte gratuit : on fera le point ensemble et je t’expliquerai comment je travaille. 
 
Tu peux aussi rejoindre mon cours en ligne : Déploie ta puissance et incarne la confiance en toi. 5 pratiques guidées téléchargeables pour travailler sur tous les niveaux de ton être.

 

4)  Use the quantum field: now take a moment to close your eyes and visualise yourself expanding, as you breathe in and out, become aware of your energy field around your physical body. Imagine a flow of light coming from your heart, and circulating inside and around you. Then start visualising yourself living your intention. Imagine the new expanded you, in one or several situations where your intention has become concrete; experience everything with all your senses. What can you feel, smell, see, touch, hear, taste? Where are you? What's happening? How does it make you feel? Connect to the emotion. What is the impact for yourself, but also for others around you? Connect deeply to that feeling. Live the movie of your intention. 

5) Repeat for @ least 21 days: When somebody wants to become fit, they don't go to the gym only once. They make a habit out of it, practice regularly. It's the same for everything. Change doesn't happen over night by just asking. You need to put work into it. And it can be fun and joyful! 

6)  Let go of the when and the how. Patience and trust are key. Let the Universe show you the way, look out for signs and synchronicity. It might have better plans for you! If you feel stuck and your intention doesn't manifest, it means there is something else that you need to experience first, that will take you to the right place and on the path you need to go through to manifest something even better. If you don't know how to make sense of it, or if you feel there is big blockage/wound inside you that is in the way of your happiness, ask for support. I'd be happy to help you make space for whatever you want in your life. ​

​Check out my services here

Yesterday morning I had a meltdown. I haven’t had a meltdown in a long time.  I had some in the past of course, because like everyone I am human. But since the beginning of this worldwide “pandemic” situation, I actually have been feeling pretty good. I feel like I’ve been “prepared” for this. Over the last few weeks I did experience a rollercoaster of mixed emotions but I was definitely able to watch them, let them come to the surface, and process them to reflect or work on myself, grow in a way, all in good spirits. I also had time to take care of myself and do a lot of things that I enjoy: meditating, reading, gardening, forest bathing, reading. I gave myself permission to let go of pressure, and chose to work when I felt it was ok for me to do so. I had some great moments of communion with nature and of connection with the Universe, the Source, whatever you want to call it. I had some deep insights, and I also experienced some profound joy. This, in parallel with sadness, anger, fear, guilt, etc. All at the same time, and totally fine with it all. I was not only finding my own journey really interesting but also the journey of the collective and everyone I hold space for in these times.
 
And I am not sure what happened yesterday exactly and I can only describe it and understand it from my reality but I clearly felt that my soul wanted me to go through this meltdown, to remind me what it is like, and that to remind me that this also would pass. I am glad I did experience it, even if it was painful: the puffy eyes from not being able to stop crying, the headache from dehydration, the exhaustion from the need for the body to recover, the desire to numb myself from those feelings.
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Until Monday I had been very good at setting proper boundaries regarding the use of my time: limiting my time on the internet, choosing when I wanted to connect with friends, and looking carefully when I was happy and ready to work with a client. On Monday, though, I kind of lost myself in the news and social media. And the more I read and watched, the more I felt I wanted to go all the way in, like something was pulling me. I did go in step by step, consciously observing what I was feeling was I was doing it. Being aware did not, however, prevent me from taking it “too” far and getting triggered. So at the end of the day when I went to bed I felt very angry and sad (not scared for some reason). I got up yesterday morning with a knot in my belly, a pressure in my liver both in the front and in the back. After 10 minutes of meditation I started crying my heart out. And it felt strange, it was both a great sense of release, and yet it was so painful.
 
Because I have experienced this before, I know how to take care of myself, to listen to my needs, to process, to let it be and pass in its own time, to appreciate what I can learn, etc.  
 
But that is not the point of this article. My point is this: I work in the field of holding space for other people, my job is to make them feel safe, in a place where all emotions and all parts of themselves are welcome. And I want to say this, because as therapists we are often taught not to share our own vulnerability with others. I say F*** this. I have never applied this rule because I do feel the opposite is more powerful. To remind yourself and others that we are all human beings. And that nobody should be a on a pedestal where “enlightenment” and “awakening” looks like everything is fine all the time. Because it is NOT and that would set an unrealistic and impossible goal to achieve.

This is true not only for my profession, but also for all the doctors, nurses and helpers out there. It is true for, the police, the firefighters, the security guards, dance teachers, yoga teachers, meditation teachers and all the other “gurus” (in the teacher sense) out there; it is also true for your parents, the friends you admire and think are strong. This is true for everyone!
And more to the point, just because you have up and downs, and you allow your meltdowns to exist and to be seen, does not mean that you can’t be there for somebody else. I can still be there for my friends. I can still work with my clients. And that is because I know how, when and who to turn to when I need support. And everyone should also have that: a friend, a community, a professional, a book, a tool. Etc. But if we keep denying ourselves the right to be vulnerable, we deny ourselves the right to be human, and that is what we all are. Even more so now.
 
And please, let’s stop telling people how they should feel. Let’s stop telling people they should not complain. Let’s stop telling people they should be happy they have a roof over their head. Let’s stop comparing. Let’s stop making people feel guilty. Everyone is on a journey here. Some might feel happy, grateful and calm; others might feel angry, scared and sad. Some might feel all of these, at the same time, or at different moments. Some might feel nothing. Some might feel it strongly. Some might feel it gently. Some might enjoy this moment to take care of themselves. Some might feel they have to do more. Some might want to do nothing. Some might want to talk, some might want to stay silent. Some might feel deeply some old wounds coming back to the surface. Some might feel a big opening...Some might already be very resilient, some might not.  
We don’t heal by judging our emotions, and we don’t help anyone by telling them how they should or should not feel. Only they can know how they feel. We need to try and meet one other where we are, being aware that even if we wish we were in the same place, we might not be, and that’s ok. We might feel strong in some moments and vulnerable in others, and really that's ok. 

My hotline is free and open to all in case you do need to talk and be held in safe space: ​https://calendly.com/laughingbutterfly/hotline-laughing-butterfly

Hello there !
 
How are you doing ?
I hesitated for quite a while before sending an email about the current situation… because I personally feel overwhelmed by the amount of information (and fake news !) which we are all receiving at the moment.  But in the end, here it is ! You obviously can decide whether or not you want to read it.

What I have seen so far is that some people are actually feeling quite fine with what is happening worldwide, others are going through a mix of emotions, and others have entered into a rollercoaster of anxiety, panic, sadness etc, and don’t seem to be able to get out of it.


Let’s be clear. In my opinion, some people have been preparing for this for a few months, even a few years already. Of course they didn’t know exactly what was going to happen, but they have done some work on themselves, they know themselves, their wounds, their weaknesses and their strengths. It does not mean that they are not surfing the waves of emotions but maybe they are able to welcome them and trust the experience.
For others, it might be quite a shock! Like for every accident, serious illness, loss, crisis, burnout, etc. they don’t know how to deal with it, react, behave, and handle what’s happening.
What I would like to tell you is this : it’s not the end, for anyone. Every crisis is an invitation to “transform”… it doesn’t need to be some radical or amazing change, it can be a small realisation, a small step, some help to make a decision, etc.

This crisis is a collective one, but it doesn’t mean that we can’t make choices individually. Yes we are limited in terms of physical space but not with our mind, body and energy !
We always have a choice, even when we are not conscious of it. We can choose to keep ourselves busy, to play the victim, to have fun, to learn, to stop, to enjoy, to process, to become very creative, to panic, to cry, to laugh, to sing, not to do anything, to think, to be inspired and inspiring, to get frustrated, to scream, to look at ourselves and the world, to listen, to question ourselves, to be hopeful, to be ok with not knowing, to become more conscious, to wish for the best, to imagine the worst, etc.

We are allowed and it’s totally okay to go through these different phases… What we need to do though is to see what is helping us and what is actually making us feel worse, in order not to remain stuck.
 
In fact, the way to approach this is the same as usual: stop, observe, breathe, be with the silent and the void, allow yourself to feel everything and ask yourself: “what do I need? What brings me joy? What bring me lightness of being?” without looking and what others are doing or comparing yourself as not everyone is at the same stage of the process. And that’s ok!

Yes, I know, that we might not like what we are feeling: void, loneliness, and silence force us to look at our suffering, our fears, our angers, our sorrows, etc. But it’s only when we welcome these that we can heal them. We have this choice now. We can either keep sleeping in front of TV or on social media or awaken to what is and what we are deeply in our hearts and bodies, day by day, hour by hour, moment by moment.
 
So how are you ? What is your choice right now ? What do you need ? Do you manage to stop and listen to yourself ? Let me know by email!
 
If you are not able to stop then have some fun trying out things (and it’s ok to fail !), checking in with yourself before and after.
For instance :
-Do I feel better or worse after spending two hours on the internet ?
-Do I feel better or worse after speaking with a friend on the phone?
-Do I feel better or worse after cooking something good ?
-Do I feel better or worse after crying for an hour ?
-Do I feel better or worse after meditating ?
-Do I feel better or worse after moving my body?
Etc.
There is no trick in these questions. And there is no right or wrong answer. Only YOU can know what helps you.


Oh believe me I know it’s not easy. Every crisis and change require courage. And right now everything is coming to the surface more strongly. The bad news is that it can be very violent. The good news is that it is clearer and easier to recognise what needs to heal and what works for you.

At  the beginning of the year, I made myself a promise : do things from a place of joy and love, or not do them at all. It sounds simple, doesn’t it ? It’s a fast way to sort out what you want to do.
Well… in fact with all our « obligations », the way our current system and society work, people’s opinion, etc., it can actually be challenging.
I’ll give you an example: since the beginning of the confinement, I’ve ben asked and told i don’t know how many times to show up more online. Except everything I’m feeling emotionally and physically is telling me NO !
I am not going to lie to you, my mind went a bit crazy… Of course I want to contribute, help, support, share my skills. But what I have been observing is that we all rushed into transferring everything we usually do online without taking a step back. And now we have 10 times more information and offers to deal with and it’s getting harder and harder to sort out.

On a personal level (and this is true for me, it might not be for you), I feel this situation is an invitation to continue the deceleration process I started over 1,5 year ago. And even if I do feel a bit guilty, I know for sure that I will not be helpful by doing 10 times more. I prefer quality. I prefer to work with one person at a time, with all my heart and attention.


I don’t have all the answers. And you know what? Nobody does ! But it’s ok ! It’s the perfect opportunity to trust yourself, and to embrace uncertainty.

And if you do feel the need to be supported in this process… You know I would be more than happy to be there for you.
To book a session you can go here

I wish you well.
Lots of love,
Sylvie