My heart was torn apart. Big time. Like never before. It took me a while to get over it, to recover. But you know what ? I don’t regret it. Because this time I consciously decided to keep my heart fully open, in spite of the pain. I opened up to receive love like I had never done in the past, and I showed up as me, the real me. And this I will keep. I will not go back to pretending to be somebody else to be loved. This is one of the greatest lesson for me in 2016.
In 2016 I quit a job that didn’t match my values anymore ; it took me a long time to decide because I was torn between my rational thinking and my intuition, between my guilt and my desire, between my fears and my hopes. Once again !
But my body wouldn’t let me lie to myself anymore. « Enough ! », it kept saying. You are needed somewhere else. You know better. My body, my dear temple, how I have mistreated you. I am so sorry. I thought i had understood how to listen to my body more carefully. How wrong I was ! My body reminded me that it knows better, that I can trust it ALL THE TIME and that the faster I listen to it, the faster I learn, the faster I can move to the next stage. I will not make that mistake again.
In 2016 I met people who are involved in beautiful projects, who are working towards solutions to improve the way we live, who have beautiful visions and are moving forward with them. I met people who show up everyday and shine their light over the world. They inspire me and I hope I also inspire some people.
In 2016 I met people who are struggling, but who keep hope and faith, people who are grateful for the little things they have.
In 2016 I met people who struggled and who wanted to die. In 2016 I wanted to die at some point. I met people who had lost hope and faith, people who were desperate, afraid, sad, angry, exhausted. I was all those things too. In 2016 I had moments when I thought I was going backwards. I doubted myself so much. I doubted the world. So after a lot of resistance I finally accepted to rest for a while. I survived this phase and it actually made me stronger. It showed me how to help better those who have lost faith and hope. By stepping back for a while, I bounced back and I actually took a bigger leap. In the end I chose to live instead of surviving. I am not the same person I was a year ago. And I think I am a better person. I am expanding. And I know you are too, even if you don’t feel it.
I know there will be more challenges ahead, but I know the challenges are helping me find who i want to be and be that person.
Sometimes, I am tired, I am even exhausted. I think that I have done so much work on myself already ! When does it stop ? Well 2016 made me realize that it doesn’t. There are some great moments, there are some very painful moments. As I keep peeling the layers, I find myself a bit more, Iunderstand myself a bit more, I know myself a bit more, and I find meaning, direction and I keep moving forwards. When I think I have understood something, the universe sends me a test, more or less enjoyable, and sometimes I don’t get it right away. I try to enjoy the path, because that what life is about for me. Yes there are some tough times, but that is how I learn, that is how I grow.
And that’s also how I meet new people. As I connect more deeply to my values, to my fears but also to my courage, I connect more deeply with other human beings who are on the same path.
And it is also how by learning what I don’t want anymore, I find out what I want more of. And it helps me focus on joy, love and faith.
So out of all the ups and downs of 2016, I hope I can and I will choose to remember faith, joy, laughter and love ; and I hope I can continue to help people see through the sadness and sorrow, that life is worth it, that together we can be powerful, joyful and shine LOVE.
Write something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview.